I’m what they call a glamazon. A #girlboss and an icon. Someone always ready to lead the charge, to take center stage, to tell you that I know I look good…

At least that’s who I am when I buy lipstick. The rest of the time you’ll find me somewhere between a couch gremlin and a normal woman with a couple of good friends and a Wordle addiction. That woman - the one who works hard at her career and likes to grab cocktails with friends - has a tough time actually wearing the lipstick that glamazon me buys.

I usually purchase lipstick for a special event, or after a brunch with girlfriends who’ve made me feel like my absolute best and most powerful self. I’ll wear it once or twice, but more often than not it ends up forgotten in pockets or purses, eventually becoming an artefact I’ll unearth one day while cleaning out a moving box. Open the flaps, look inside, and there it is: a glittery makeup bag tucked in next to a leaky watering can (that I can definitely fix, right?), the kite I bought and flew on a beach trip to the coast, and the backpacking pillow I used the one and only time I went backpacking (I hated it).

There’s probably $400 worth of lipstick in that bag, and the tubes are more-than-likely all expired.

So, what’s the deal? Why do I, like many women, keep buying cosmetics and never using them?

For me, the problem is living up to the expectation of lipstick. I find it intimidating. I’ll routinely put on a full face of makeup with four colors of eyeshadow and finish the look with Chapstick.

Those lipsticks are just so serious if I’m not feeling FULL girlboss - yes even the nude ones. Most of the time I want to look put together without feeling like I can conquer the world. I don’t want to commit to being my best self every time I leave the house - I need the option to show up as the medium version of myself, the one who has fewer expectations. As a result, that lipstick-packed cosmetic bag continues to sit in its cardboard box in my office, right next to the other things that just don’t quite fit into my life.

Vermouth just feels good. Not physically - well, yes, physically - but it also feels right emotionally for me. It’s not so precious that it needs to be rationed or carefully applied. It’s easy, it looks good and effortless, and I use it often enough that it has earned a place on my desk. It’s also versatile: I can throw it on before a 6 am work call and look put together, or wear it out to coffee with a girlfriend and not feel overdone. For me, Vermouth solved the problem of lipstick wastefulness by being the right thing for me, even when I’m not at my best. It helps me feel good by meeting me where I’m at.

As for my cosmetic bag full of lipsticks? I still might want them for New Year’s Eve, or the fancy event where I need to be the absolute most, but for the day to day, Vermouth takes me from Gremlin to Wordler to Glamazon and back without any stress or mess, and that’s why it works for me.